Help my ex hates me but I still love her?

Okay so about 10 months ago I met this girl named Mary at the very beginning we were insanely in love I have never felt this way about a girl before we would jIke and talk I loved her and she loved me, so about four months later she asked me out and I said yes everything was perfect for me I uave never been happier, then her best friend Tyler and her got into a huge fight because Tyler dident "sign off" or say "it's okay" that we could date after a few days of her being sad because she wanted her best friend back she decided to break up with me so she could get Tyler back I was mad of course because Tyler ripped everything In my life away, we were still friends after the break up and I would get really depressed and I would tell Mary that Tyler is a deuch bag and I hate him, then Mary got mad at me for making fun of her best friend by that time I was depressed for 2 months I would often cry because I wanted Mary back, then mary tried to just be friends I was still extremely in love, and every time she would try to have a normal friend to friend conversation I would get depressed, and just awnser in one word kind of responses, then she would get mad, after that I would ask her why she dosent like me anymore and she would say it's not just you, I want to be alone this was 3 months after tge break up, when she would tell me she dosent like me I would flip out and tell her to **** off... Ect after that we dident talk for a few months then I texted her saying I was a dick and I don't derserve you and she would try to change the conversation, one day we were fighting over text while she was with her friend Hannah Hannah told me to leave Mary alone so I told her to mind her own bisnuess and she would yell at me, then Hannah and I started talking and I stopped talking to Mary then I noticed Mary texted me her and Hannah hate each other now over some other guy, Mary wanted me back and I said no you hurt me, I made a mistake:( I miss her help me:(